July 17, 2020

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There was a time when I felt like a fraud.⁣

Some of you may know I am an advocate of self love and body love.🥰

But that was easy to do and talk about, then…⁣

Because let’s be real…🤷‍♀️

By societal standards, I did have a pretty goddamn sexy body on the photos I posted (Mainly because I eat healthy) ⁣😅🙊

So it’s actually quite easy to “love my body” and “feel good” and “feel sexy”⁣

And I’ve talked about being my meanest critique, because DESPITE this healthy body size and proportion, I used to focus on everything that was wrong- my flaws. 😳

And there was always one thing I could find wrong, or not enough. 😤

😒I used to NOT see myself as beautiful, nor appreciated my body. ⁣

☹️ My ego constantly needed validation, and to be told that I look good/sexy/attractive.⁣

To the point that I feel like my self worth and self esteem depended on these compliments. 💔

And even when I got it, I would instantly reject it 😫

Despite the TONS of compliments… I actually didn’t truly accept it- that I was beautiful, or that others see me as such. Yes it would feel good for a bit, but I instantly dismiss it🤔

⁣Because I DID not feel that way, so I DID NOT believe what others say…😑⁣

And I know I’m not the only one who felt this way. ⁣

One of the reasons for this is from the unrealistic societal standards of beauty that was glamorised by the media. 🤦‍♀️

Fortunately, with continued dedication to working on myself, and self-love practices⁣

I have finally healed and unlearned majority of the sources of these mean inner critique of my ego.⁣

And have finally fully accepted and loved my body, and appreciated how fuckin beautiful this body suit is⁣

AND THEN THE TEST COMES.⁣

With just 6 months to go before I turn 30, I notice I am actually starting to gain some weight 🙊

My body no longer looks like what it ‘was’. ⁣

At first I thought I was going to go back to my self loathing and was almost expecting that man inner critique to take over and beat my self esteem.⁣

But you know what?? I CAN STILL SEE, SAY, AND FEEL HOW BEAUTIFUL AND HOW MUCH LOVE I AM GIVING AND RECEIVING FROM THIS BODY. ⁣

NOW I CAN TRULY SAY…. ALL BODY SIZE AND SHAPE IS TRULY UNIQUELY BEAUTIFUL.⁣

And I love that this is not just showing up for myself…⁣

Because I have stopped judging myself, I have stopped judging others. ⁣

I now truly see, appreciate and love the beautify of a human body, regardless of size, sex, shape, age, marks, etc. ❤️

AND IT FEELS SOOOOOO LIBERATING. ⁣

 

 

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Say it with me:⁣

I LOVE MY BODY.⁣

I APPRECIATE MY BODY.⁣

I LOVE MY SELF.⁣

I AM UNIQUE.⁣

I AM BEAUTIFUL.⁣

x Sarah S.

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*photos credit to the owners

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